So, in complete opposition to my last entry today was NOT such a good day. I am confused as to why people use threats. All it does is hurt people in the long run anyway. I just don't get why someone would feel like they have to threathen someone to do something when they really won't be doing it with their whole heart anyway. It feels like a soap opera cuz they always threaten people and get away with it, LOL. Now it isn't me who is being threatened but someone very close to me and they feel like they have to live a certain way that they do not want to or something bad is going to happen.

CRAZINESS is all I can say!!

Today someone said something to me that really really hurt. Now I know it was in the heat of the moment but it still hurts...really bad. I mean when you are really close to someone up to the point where you spend time with each other at least 3 days out of the week you think they care as much about yuo ad you do them. I guess all that gets thrown out the door when they are mad. And they weren't even mad at me!!! Long story short, someone I care about was threatening someone in my family, (not like physically) and I was in my family member's defense. So I was like, if you do that, I don't know if I will be able to have anything to do with you anymore and the person doing the threatening said well lemme see, would it hurt if you did that, yeah I guess a little bit, would my heart be broken? No, would I lose any sleep over it? No.
That was a salp in the face. The funny thing is, no matter how mad I would be at this person, it would hurt really bad for me to disassociate myself from them...it would break my heart...and I WOULD lose sleep over it.

~Sometimes I wonder who really cares as much as they may say they do!~


Today was THE best day that I have had in an awfuly long time, and it came in the ways that I wouldn't really expect it.
I am so thankful for Thanksgiving! It is a wonderful time! I am thankful for friends and family and for God's grace and deliverance from the tempter's snares.

God "reunited" me persay with one of my very good friends tonight and I am so glad because I missed the heck outta her.

God also showed some of my friends ways that they needed to change their lifestyles. It's funny how time after time we screw up God's plan but He always provides an escape. Thank You Lord!!

I cannot wait to see all the wonderful things God has in store for me and my family (which includes all my friends) and watch them come to fruition!!

God is good...All the time!!

All the time...God is good!!

<3>


I am thinking about a lot of stuff right now and it is kinda wierd but it is all just kinda flowing out!!
Anyways, I don't understand why someone who is in a really bad situation and knows what he needs to do in ths situation won't do it or when he tries to do it, he changes his mind...COME ON!!
I am also really excited because some of my very favorite people ever are in town or coming in town soon!! Heather and Tye are here, Patrick is coming soon, and so are Jason and PJ and Aiden and Elijah, exciting exciting!! I don't even care a bout the food, I just care about them being here!!
Also, guys...most of you need to grow up and be men!!! I know very few people who stand up for what they believe and I mean really stand up. Don't wimp out, be a man and take a stand...geez!
Remember the Veggie Tales song: Stand up, stand up for what you believe in believe in!!YAY!

Most importantly tell the people you love that you love them!!


So, lately I have been thinking about why we do the things we do. I understand that God gives a choice and we are not forced to live a certain way. I know we all have desires of the flesh and everything but I cannot seem to wrap my head around why we do the things we do when we know where it will lead.

I wrote this poem a couple years ago and I think it is very relevant.

~Wrong Motives~
When I think about the world
and how we live our lives,
I think about our passions
and how we find husbands and wives.
I wonder why we put such importance
on so many trivial and worldly things
when we can only look forward
and know what eternity will bring.
We base our lives on how we look
and who we are with,
when all that really matters is
who our Heavenly Father is...
Popularity, that's a myth!!
We need to realize
that our motives are all wrong
and that the reason for our being
has been evident all along.
He put us here
and He wants us to live for Him,
not by fleshly wants,
but by desires from within.
He put us on this earth
and He grciously died for us,
and He did this even though
it is our nature to lie, kill and lust.
He knows everything we will do,
and everything we have done
but we have a place in Heaven
through His wonderful and Holy Son.
So, we should change our motives
to living for Him alone
and if we do that, in a few years,
we will see how much we've grown.
So trust in the Heavenly Father
and surrender yourself to Him
and the pathway will no longer be lonely
and the light will not be dim.
Today I realized some things...
  • No matter how many times I get frustrated I am constantly reminded of God's perfect timing.
  • LU advisors do not respond to your e-mail in decent timing when you need something.
  • The things you care about the most really are where you spend all your time and what makes you the happiest/most unhappy.


OK, so I am moving back to LU in January, which I am really excited about but there is one thing that keeps me frustrated. I cannot find a place to live!!! I need one!! I know that God is going to work it out, but I am so impatient that it stresses me out! So, I would ask for all of those who read this or care to pray for me that God will bless me with being able to find somewhere in my price range! I would greatly appreciate that.

On another note, these times we are approaching are very busy, the thing is I am not as busy as I usually am. I guess that has something to do with the fact that I am not in school right now and I do not have a job, (I need that too!!)

Anyway, hope everything is going well in whoevers lives that are reading this. Have a great day and I guess I will Holler at ya'll some other time!

*~*PeAcE oUt DoG!!!*~*


November 12, 1986 is the birthday of a very dear friend of mine: Garon Neal Shaver.Today, on November 12, 2006 he should be twenty years old, but earlier this year on June 2 he went to be with our Lord. He was in a car accident about 1 mile from his home. He fell asleep at the wheel and flipped his car and was killed on impact.

I miss him so much and to this day it is hard for me to even accept the fact that he is gone! So, I was expecting my day to be very depressing and not so cheery, that's normal. Well, ever since Garon's death, his father has been in church almost every Sunday morning, night, and Wednesday night whereas before, I cannot recall a time I saw him in church since Garon's baptism. It amazes me what God can do through terrible circumstances. We do not understand why God does things a certain way, but I know that God knows much better than I do and I am so glad that He is in control.

I thank God everyday that Garon knew Him and that I have the assuring factor of knowing that one day I will see him in our Heavenly home. That alone excites me! A friend of mine told me one time when an older woman at our church died that was close to all of us something that really put it all into perspective. We were al sad because we didn't think it was time for the people to go that we loved. He said that the important thing to realize is that the are dancing with our Father God in fields of Grace and are so glad that they are out of such a sin-filled world.

I thank God for all His blessings and I encourage anyone who is reading this to tell all of those you love the things you would want them to know before they died.



I am so glad that I have fellow Christians to give encouragement to and recieve encouragement from!! It is such a blessing to recieve a completely unexpected phone call and be told, "I just wanted to let you know that I love you and I wanted to thank you for never giving up on me!" That feels so good, because I have been in so many situations where I see someone I care about doing something totally out of character and/or detrimental to the Christian witness. Out of pure instinct I guess, I immediately feel as though I must let them know how I feel and encourage them to make changes.

On so many ocassions, more often than not, the recipient/s of my scolding (for lack of a better word) get very defensive and possibly angry with me. I am told I am not perfect and accused of having a holier than thou attitude and that I have no right to judge them. So, this person is frustrated with me because I pointed out a weakness/wrongoing, and I am frustrated because I am just trying to help and I am hesitant of doing this again.

The thing is, if I am living in a way that shows others (whether they are Christians or not) that I am not focusing first and foremost on Christ, I want my friends and/or fellow Christians to point it out to me so that I will no longer be a stumbling block to anyone.

I want to encourage you, as fellow believers to do precisely what is sometimes so hard. I know people's feelings may get hurt but eventually God will use you or someone else to reach them and they will realize you were right and whether they admit it or not, they will appreciate what you did. In as many times as I have gotten frustrated and been called judgmental, etc. I have also been thanked for staying firm and letting my friends know how I feel.

So, this all boils down to one of my favorite verses in the Bible. ~Philippians 1:19-20 says, Yes, and I will rejoice for I know that this shall turn to my salvation through your prayer, and the supply of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, according to my earnest expectation and hope that in nothing shall I be ashamed, but that with all boldness as always, so now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it be by life or by death.~

I was preparing to go on a mission trip to El Salvador a few years back and things were not working out the way we had hoped they would. We ended up not being able to travel as we had planned and we were all upset. The thing is, God had bigger plans for us in our own church while we would have been gone. He worked it out for the best and we were all glad that we stayed!! A woman pointed this verse out to me and a friend and told us not to worry because God would handle everything. Philippians tells us to perservere, even when it is hard, no, especially when it is harder than we could have imagined. Go is working and if you are doing His will, the work you do will come to fruition in His glory!!

~*DoN't GiVe Up On DoInG aNyThInG gOd TeLlS yOu To Do!!!*~


So, I am really excited about this!! I think all the time about so many things and now I think it will be very good to get it out there!! I only pray that something I have to say will have some affect on someone and will always glorify God!!

So, friends and family are a big part of my life, as well as I am sure they are to anyone. I care a lot about the people I love sometimes I feel, more than myself. I do find on more occassions than I would like though that the people closest to me are the people that tend to hurt me the most.

I know that it happens so often that somone hurts my feelings or does something that seems so mean and maybe even outright hateful. After talking to the person and sorting out the differences, I understand that things happen and I forgive them because I love them and I know they mean well. Well, what if it keeps happening over and over again? Then I start to feel like a lot of it is my fault because by forgiving them I allow it to keep happening.

ANSWER:
~Matthew 18: 21-
21.Then came Peter to him and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? till seven times? 22.Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but until seventy times seven.

Although people hurt us and we naturally want to shut ourselves off from them in order to prevent ourselves from getting hurt again, it is important for us to show God's love and forgive them and allow them to grow and better the relationship.

Think of all the dirty, rotten, and nasty things we have done in our lifetime, everyone makes mistakes. Now think that all of those things are written on a chalkboard (it's gotta be big, I know). Now Jesus sees all of these things and they hurt His heart so badly, but He still makes the decision to wipe the entire slate clean and forgive us of everything. If Jesus can forgive us for all we have done in our entire lifetime, how can we deny anyone forgiveness?

A good thing to remember is...
~The grudges that we keep are equal to the
distance between our hearts and God's heart. ~

The more distance we put between ourselves and fellow Christians, the more distance we put between our hearts and God's heart. It is like the spokes on a bicycle wheel. In the center of the wheel, all the spokes are so close, they almost touch and in effect, they protect each other. However, the farther away from the center the spokes get, the farther away from each other they get. They are more vulnerable when they are separated. Remember that people make mistakes and big ones at that but if you keep a grudge against someone, you are pushing yourself away from God.

~FoRgIvE~